Microsoft and GM

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Global Warming

Doogle

I have to be more regular, don't I. Great new search engine all the way from Ireland. See Doogle.

I shit on revolutionary vanguards

Now if there ever was a Quixote type of fellow with a Quixote type of sense of humour it has to be Zapatista leader Subcomandante Marcos. Read his letter to ETA, just amazing...click here.

Google Zeitgeist

Google Zeitgeist, a good place to see where weary net travellers are looking for the truth, click here to see it.

Corruption

Just stubbled upon this again on the net, has to be one of my favourite sayings: "Knowledge is power ... but power corrupts ... and corruption is a crime ... and crime doesn't pay ... so if you keep on studying YOU'LL GO BROKE!" (Dogbert)

Laugh It Off: SAB the loser

T-shirt maker Laugh It Off has won its fight against South African Breweries (SAB) over its right to mock the Carling Black Label brand, more. Justice Albie Sachs, said: "The evidence indicates that everybody concerned with the t-shirts, whether producer or consumer, knew that they were intended to poke fun at the dominance exercised by brand names in our social and cultural life." The t-shirt reads: "Black Labour White Guilt, Africa's lusty lively exploitation since 1652, no regard given worldwide"

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Bubble Wrap

One of the great inventions in the world...bubble wrap...for stress relief that is...now digitized, click here...added to my list of "New Discoveries".

Costumes for your Cat

Whooohoo....back in the saddle after a break. I will tell you about my travels some time...right now just happy to be back on my adventures. How about a silly start, still on the cat theme for some reason....do they hold some key to understanding life and my quest. Why do I doubt that? Anyway, came across this today and it made me smile, costumes for your cat. These earthlings are mad. Anyway, despite this silly start, I do endeavour to offer some meaningful philosophical ponderings on life in my next postings....